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  • Writer's picturedrschwank

Couples Together-Apart

Updated: Apr 26, 2020

How do couples around the world cope with the COVID-19 pandemic?

What are the triggers to get on each other’s nerves?

How can we redefine our romantic, passionate time together, rather than live like roommates?

The current situation is challenging for romantic couples around the world. Whether they are together or apart. Some couples are faced with “cabin fever”, suddenly confronted with togetherness they never had before. Not even on during joint vacation in a caravan togetherness was that expensive.

This can take a toll on the relationship, creating tensions, flights, decrease turning to and increase turning away from each other. Despite the extensive time together, the pandemic increases stress and anxiety, both contribute to less rational and more irrational behavior. Small things can cause the situation to escalate and end up in an argument or fight.

The daily life during the pandemic, but also in other stressful times in life can cause couples to function on autopilot, simply doing things, living next to each other like roommates, rather than romantic partners. Arrange a date night each week, where you create a space exclusively for you as a couple. Date nights are important to create space for intimacy, affection, love, passion, and sex.

Being apart during the COVID-19 pandemic, as many health care professionals face to protect their families from getting infected can also challenge the relationship. Create a sense of unity, togetherness when apart is essential to keep the relationship active. It is important to find ways to maintain intimacy even when apart and digital technology, such as video calls and photographs are important.

Couples often have unspoken expectations among each other, also known as “love language”. These different love languages are ways to show affection. Each one of us has a different way of showing that we genuinely care for each other. If however the way one partner expresses his affection to the other is by buying gifts and through that shows affection, yet the partner prefers intimacy. Both do not get their needs met and are in constant waiting for the other to finally get it. It is important to discuss with each other and figure out your love language, the way you show each other affection.

Tips and insights from research and clinical practice:

- Providing each other space

- Take a time out to reduce the feeling of being overwhelmed

- Date nights

- Discuss love languages

“Schedule a date night every week to create a space for intimacy, passion, touch, and sex”


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